unexpected spurting

i knew it!

i told myself, "don't go on there..don't go and read what's up"
but noooo, i had to, thinking that if i read it there might be some interesting stuff there that would possible NOT affect me.

but ohhhh no. i read it and *knife action* right in the middle of my *bah-bum..bah-bum..bah-bum* heart.

STUPID THING TO DO!
why choose today of all days to read up on it.

you haven't in ages..but today had to be the day!

anyways, funny thing is.. i got cut open and my imaginary blood started spurting out (spurting..is that a word?) and i found the only way to lessen the..blood-spillage.. was to write about it.

and its actually working.. typing this out and making it sound all..weird.. is actually helping it go away.

anyways, my point is.. 1.things really do happen unexpectedly..well, for me it has. I though that such a small act wouldnt affect me. but it did. it bugged me for the whole dayyyy

"adding a reactant causes a net forward reaction..POP..damnit! im trying to study"

that was me trying to study and it poped into my head.

2. things happen for a reason.. me reading up on something that bugged the hell out of me was meant to happen. im supposed to learn something from this.. *thinks* yes..it will help me get on with my life. these are the painful steps i will take to rid you from my system. its natural. right?

but yea, *deep breaths* i think im fine now
i was just shocked thats all.

wow, i have a chemistry SAC tomorrow..i should really start studying..

effin shitake mushrooms! all i gotta say is GOOD LUCK, and i temporarily hate you.. but thats my way of "getting over it" cos it doesnt seem to happen when im thinking "nice" things about you.

i think its easier to get over things when you dont even like it.

anyways, this is jumping all over the place.

so ill leave you by saying.. i love you & i hate you. life is unfair, but dont we live in a world thats meant to be fair? sooo.. read this slowly, so you can try make sense of what i think.. maybe we're meant to think and believe that life is unfair so that we are able to accept such..um, terrible-things-that-cause-us-pain sorta stuff. if we lived to believe that life was fair, we wouldnt get far, cos life doesnt run on a straight line, its has its bumps. soooo..i have no idea anymore what im saying so if you kinda understood that..GREAt! at least you did ha

Peace&Love